The Best of Email Humor
I HATE SPAM. And I'm not too fond of impersonal "cut-and-paste" email either. However, I have received my share of cute and/or funny email stories/pictures. So I figured I'd start a little online library of my favorites. Some "adult" content, but nothing too major. Feel free to cut & paste them to your friends. I marked my favorites with a green dot . - jim
Table of Contents:
- Administratium - The heaviest element yet known to science
- Age Barometer - Do you remember candy cigarettes? Take the quiz.
- Airline Humor - Cute excerpts of airline attendant's in-flight safety lectures.
- Anagrams - Rearrange letters to form new words. Dormitory > Dirty Room.
- Bad Jokes - Some great bad jokes.
- Balls - Corporate America's recreation preferences.
- Bumper Stickers - "Cover me. I'm changing lanes".
Canadian - Why can't I own a Canadian?
Carlin - The warped thoughts of George Carlin.
- Cat Bath - How to bathe a cat.
- Change Letter - Contest winners - Change one letter to create a brand new word.
- Children's Books - Children's books you will never see.
- Church Bloopers - "Don't let worry kill you. Let the Church help."
- Cigars - Only in the U.S. legal system. Man sues for cigars lost in "fires".
- Conversions - "1000 aches: 1 kilohurtz"
- Dilbert Contest - Submissions to a "Dilbert Quotes from real-life managers" contest.
- Dog Laws - Dog Law #2: "If it's in my mouth, it's mine."
Dr. Seuss - If Dr. Seuss Were a Technical Writer...
- Engineers - Understanding Engineers.
- Ethical Questions - Two ethical questions.
- Evaluation - Supervisor evaluations. :AVERAGE: Not too bright".
- Excuses - Some actual written excuses given to teachers by parents.
- From Kids - Things I learned from my children.
- Fun Signs - "Mental Health Prevention Center"
- Girlfriend 4.0 - Upgrading may cause conflicts.
- God vs. Satan - God created healthful yogurt. And Satan brought forth chocolate.
- Gorsky - Walking on the moon: "Good luck, Mr. Gorsky".
- Guy Rules - Rules that guys wish girls knew.
- Ha Ha's - "Honk if you love peace and quiet".
- Headlines - "Clinton Wins Budget, More Lies Ahead"
- Hell - Actual question on a University of Washington chemistry midterm.
- Honk if you love Jesus - One baptist's experience at a traffic light.
- Idiots - More evidence that this world is full of idiots.
- Job Evaluations - Great line from job evaluations.
- Leopard vs. Dog - Can a dog really out fox a leopard?
- Life - Stages and facts of life.
- Life's Rules - "A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory".
- Lipstick - How a junior high principal solved a lipstick problem.
- Marriage - "Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight". -- Phyllis Diller.
- McDonnell - McDonnell Douglas Warranty Registration Card.
- Mergers - If 3M merged with Goodyear, what would you get? mmmGood.
- Miller G.D. - Letter sent to Miller Brewing Company and their response.
- Mouse Balls - How to clean mouse balls.
- M.S. vs. G.M. - If GM could evolve as fast as the computer industry...
- New Words - "Cube Farm: An office filled with cubicles."
- Old - You know you're getting old when...
- Out of College - You know you've been out of college too long when...
- Politically Correct Men - How to talk about men and still be politically correct.
- Personals - The real meaning of language in the personal ads.
- Phrases - Useful work phrase #15: "How about never? Does never work for you?"
- Police - Police humor.
- Presidential Quiz - Which president allegedly had an affair with his wife's half sister?
Puns - Ten puns.
- Quayle - Quotes from former Vice President Dan Quayle.
- Quotes - Valuable quotes from comedians.
- Redneck - You might be a redneck if....
- Rejection - Top 10 Rejection Lines and what they actually mean.
- Resume - Real-life examples of bad resume mistakes.
- Rooney - Andy Rooney on....
- Seminars - Seminars for men and women.
- Sound Puzzle - Say it fast: LAWN SAND JEALOUS. Answer: Los Angeles
- State Mottos - "Alabama: At Least We're not Mississippi"
- Stranded - Stranded on an island with nothing but bananas and coconuts. Stress - Anti-Stress Exercise:
- Suburbs - God and St. Francis conversing about the suburbs.
- Teaching Math - Teaching math in the 50's vs. the 90's.
- Telemarketers - 10 Ways to Terrorize a Telemarketer.
- Theories - Contest winners of "submit a theory about any darned thing".
- Top 10 - Top ten things that sound dirty but aren't:
- Trivia - What was Gilligans first name?
- Unexpected - Expect the unexpected.
- Urine Test - Accurate, and only costs $10.00!
- Van Gogh - Vincent Van Gogh's family tree. His dizzy aunt: Verti Gogh.
- Venus and Mars - Creative writing true story. Received from English Professor.
- Warnings - Actual label warning on Sears hair dryer: Do not use while sleeping.
- Wish to Say - Things We Wish We Could Say To Customers / Colleagues.
- Witness - Things lawyers say: "Were you present when your picture was taken?"
- Women Game - The "Make Women Happy Game".
- Wonderful OS - Where would Microsoft be without the Mac?